


I know I'm not the only one.

by Slybluetiful



Category: DRAMAtical Murder
Genre: Depression, M/M, Self-Harm, Smut, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-25
Updated: 2014-12-04
Packaged: 2018-02-27 00:08:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,480
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2671529
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Slybluetiful/pseuds/Slybluetiful
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This story is in the tumblr AU of Beniseragaki where in Koujaku's good end, Sly occationly comes out.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first fanfic I wrote here and I hope that you guys like it!

# Him

There he was....the man I loved, but....He only loves the other me....He loves 'Aoba' not me....It hurts......so much.....At night I always take over Aoba just to hear him but he talks about Aoba...not me!

Once again I walk downstairs and sit in the kitchen, knife in my hand and dripping blood while tearing up. "Come on asshole keep it together!" I wanna run away, I want to dissapear but I cant...

I heard someone walking downstairs and I tried to hide the knife and my blood but I was too late, He had already seen it.

"A-Aoba?! What the hell are you doing?!" He took the knife away and looked in my eyes, I looked away, not wanting to look at him but he grabbed my chin and kissed me causing me to look at him.

But when I did, Aoba got his power again and I dissapeared into his head, going though the same routine over and over again, thinking about Koujaku,crying, falling asleep and waking up crying and cursing at myself again.

'I'm pathetic' is the only thing I though while doing my routine and seeing how Koujaku had fun with Aoba and not with me, I felt horrible.

"WHY?!" Was what I screamed as tears streamed down my face and seeing Aoba's sudden reaction, he heard.

*Koujaku's POV* 

Aoba almost fell down saying that he had a headache again. "O-Oi Aoba are you okay?!" I catched him up and he mumbled something about Sly wanting to talk and keeping on screaming why.

"O-oi calm down Aoba......" He started running away and I think I saw tears?! "Aoba come back!!" I ran after him but he was already gone. "Fuck....where is he?!" Suddenly I heard voices coming from an alleyway.

"Aw come on...play with us!" "NO!! Shut up and get away from me!!!"

"But we will make you happy...heh~" "LET GO!!!"

Some guys grabbed Aoba and dragged him into a car. "HEY LET HIM GO!!!" I ran towards them but they didn't stop...They got in the car and tried to hit me with it.

"Shit! I need some help....I'l call Clear, He is fast enough..." I called Clear and after ten seconds he stood before me. "Where is master?" "There in that car!" He started running and seconds later I heard an expotion and saw Clear running towards me with Aoba in his arms.

"Thank you Clear!" Aoba avoided eyecontact with me and stood up. "I wanna go home..." He said as he grabbed my kimono and started running.

"Woah! Aoba calm down!!" "NO!!!" 'Eh? What? Normally he isn't like that...' I stopped and stood still, which made Aoba stop as well.

"Koujaku come on!" "No....." He still didn't look at me. "What?" "I said no.....Aoba....I'm worried about you! Tell me whats wrong!" It looked like he was looking down. "I cant....its....fine...." I sighed and pulled him towards me, making him look at me. "Eh? Y-your eyes.....They're different!" He had tears still streaming down his face.

"Because I'M different!!!!" I suddenly heard a clap and felt a burning pain on my face as I saw Aoba running towards our home. 'D-did he just.......h-hit me?! Whats wrong with him!?' I ran after him only to find our home totally in a mess and I heard yelling from upstairs.

"Why does he love Aoba and not me?!" I walked upstairs, opened the door to see Aoba trying to.....t-to......to kill himself! "AOBA STOP IT RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!!!" 

He stopped for a second and started laughing. "How many times do I have say it.....I'm not Aoba!"

Suddenly I realized it....how dumb have I been?! "D-don't tell me......S-Sly?!" He looked at me and smiled. "Yeah....You realized....thats great...." He walked backwards and towards the window. "Thank you..." "W-what?" He jumped out! "SLY!!!!!!!" I ran downstairs and immediatly dialed the emergency number.

"Sly! Stay with me! please!" I started crying without realizing it.

 

 

~To be continued!~


	2. How?

"SLY!!!! stay with me!!! Please!!!!" A ambulance finally got here and took him away. Sly was brought away and I was heartbroken. He......He jumped out......I......couldn't save him...I'm so weak.....

*Flashback Whoohoo~* 

"Koujaku!!" I heard a familiar voice but, it sounded like breaking. "Koujaku! It hurts! my head!" I walked towards the voice and saw him there, the little Aoba. "Aoba? What's wrong? Are you okay?"He shrugged and had one hand on his head and the other before his eyes. "I.....I'm scared.....M-my head hurts.........I hear someone...." My eyes widened and I kneeled down to him.

"Aoba....calm down....take deep breaths....in and out...." Aoba relaxed after 2 minutes and I sighed. "This can't go on...Lets go ask Tae-san for help okay?" "hmm." He nodded and I started walking, stopping after 2 steps because something pulled on my kimono. "H-hand?" I smiled softly and gave him my hand. "Lets go! I raised my other arm like superman and smiled at him.

We got at Aoba's house and I asked Tae-san for help, she eventually ordered some medicine for Aoba and Aoba had to stay home until he had the medicine.

I eventually asked Tae-san what was wrong with Aoba but she reacted with : I cant anwser that right now.. 

*AAAAAANNNNNNDDDD We're back*

"I'm so so sorry.....I should've......protected you....." I started crying and I didn't stop for hours until falling asleep.

I woke up the next morning, alone....I didn't go to work, I didn't even go outside! I couldn't do it so I just stayed at home for days and days, first 3 days in bed, the next 4 weeks just waking up, crying, trying to man up, crying again, eating something and having nightmares again and it just got worse by the minute, I missed them more and more.

Their smiles, those cute and beautiful faces, Their optimism, just everything about them.

Until finally after two and a half month, I heard my coil ringing. "H-hello?" "Hello, Is this mr. Koujaku?" It was a kind of familiar voice, but I didn't know who's it was. "Y-yeah..." "Your friends are free to be visited, They had an operation and are still alive. They have to stay calm tho-!""REALLY?!?!?!?" I jumped up. I can't believe it!! "Thank you.... so so much for calling!!" I heard my voice breaking, I laughed and cried at the same time after hanging up.

I danced around, knowing that they were alive! "They're alive!!! They're alive!!!!" I eventually grabbed my bag and ran towards the hospital on high speed.

When I finally got there, I asked for his room."Can you t-tell me the room of Aoba Seragaki?" "His room is room 411, Why do you ask?" "I got called and I am visiting him..." The woman behind the counter smiled and pointed me the way to go. "Thank you!"

I walked so fast that I almost ran, until coming to a stop in front of room 411. I wanted to enter but....I couldn't....would they be okay? Would they panic? Would they get angry? Would they still.....love me? After standing there for 5 minutes, I gathered up all my strength and opened the door.

 "Aoba? Sly? I-I....I came to visit.....god.....I just.....I'm sorry......both of you.....I'm sorry......Aoba....I should have protected you.....Sly I should've listened to you and I should've showed that I....I love you!" I walked closer to the curtains and opened them.

I stood still at the sight, I didn't react at all except for asking : "H-How......" 

There were they.....both alive.......and in seperate beds....

"mnnh? K-Koujaku?" One of the two opened his eyes and when I saw the colour I knew which one it was. "A-Aoba?" I walked closer and he smiled softly. "How come that.....you two are.....seperate?" He looked at me like I was a mad man."What the hell are you talking abo--!" Before he could finish, He saw the sight next to him, slowly waking up.

"What the....ugh....hell? Why the hell am I here?" I ran over to him. "Sly! oh my god Sly I am so so so fucking sorry!!" He looked away from me. "Sly....Do you both fucking know how long I was depressed?!?! I wanted to end my life but then I thought about you two coming back and I couldn't do it?!?!!" He still looked away and didn't say anything.

* Sly's POV* 

I dont wanna look at him....He just does this for Aoba doesn't he? I didn't look at him until he grabbed my face and slapped my right in it "Ow!! What the hell?! Why the fu--......Aoba?" W-wait what?! How?! I kept staring at Aoba and he stared back.


End file.
